Have you been burnt out lately?
Are you giving much attention to your children’s needs while neglecting your own needs?
It’s time to take some breath, relax, and take time out for yourselves.
We’ve all heard it hundreds of times before, on every flight we’ve ever taken: “Attend to your own mask before your child’s”. This is a standard part of the safety briefing on a plane, which instructs passengers what to do in case of an emergency. This particular part of the briefing refers to oxygen masks, which drop down in the event that the cabin pressure has significantly dropped.
You may have listened to it and thought it was just an empty recommendation – what difference would put your child’s mask on first really make? Surely any good parent would be anxious to secure their children’s safety before their own?
‘It is 7:00 am and my three-year-old son is already awake and jumping all over the bed trying to wake both my husband and I. I still feel sleepy and tired but I have to get up and prepare for the day. It is yet another glorious day to be a parent. My son is a late sleeper and an early riser. I do not need an alarm to wake me up, as he usually does the waking.
I usually drink some water, before stepping out into the kitchen to prepare his hot water for his morning cereal. My day has begun again and this has been our daily routine ever since his birth. We are totally lost in his wonderful world of raising him up. Yet, we tend to forget that we need to live, for them to live.’
Research has shown that most parents tend to ignore their own needs while trying to raise their children. In trying to do so, parents often become burnt out, stressed, depressed, and tired. Taking some time out as parents does not mean losing out on your children. We need to know when to pause and take a break and when to begin and end your day.
Being a parent is a wonderful opportunity and huge responsibility for most of us. It requires a lot of effort and time to be a parent. We want to be super parents for our children all the time. We want to be everything for them all the time. We forget what the bibles says in Genesis 2:24,
‘Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother, shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh’
Our children will soon grow up into adults, run off to school, marry and start their own families as well. Do not wait till they do this before you take time out for yourselves. Start now, while they are with you and let it become a routine for them to witness. Knowing that although their parents spend time with them, they also need to spend time alone as couples.
Go on…ask your neighbours, family once in a while to help you out with your children. Go out on an evening date, movie night, dance night with your partner; relax, have fun, laugh, and enjoy yourselves. Remembering you will soon be living your lives alone without them.
‘In the movie ‘Moms Night out’, Allyson (the main character) is a stay-home mother with three children. Her husband is frequently not at home and she has to take care of the children alone without any help or assistance. Her dream has always been to be a good mother and raise her children. Whenever her husband is around, he tries to help out with the children. She believes that being a parent means you have to be perfect by all standards and this makes her burnt out and stressed out all the time. She decides to spend some time out with her girlfriends and makes a wrong reservation for the date. In the end, their night out is ruined by the disappearance of her nephew and they have to join forces to search for the baby. At the end of it all, she comes to realize that there is no such thing as a ‘perfect parent’. She should learn to love herself and acknowledge that she is a beautiful mess as a parent and God is there to help her get through it’.
I recommend this faith-based comedy movie to all parents struggling to be good parents to their children. You do not have to be there all the time. There is no such thing as perfect parents. You will make mistakes and you learn from them but in all this just be yourself and carry out your duties as God requires of you. God knows that we have flaws and he helps us overcome our imperfections in so many ways.
The conclusion? This is why it’s so important to put your mask on first – because, without oxygen, you might not be physically capable of putting your child’s mask on, let alone your own. By attending to your own first, it ensures you will have the mental and physical facilities needed to take care of your children. If you become incapacitated through lack of oxygen, you’re no use to anyone.
The above instruction is the same in our lives as parents. Let us remember to take time out as parents to celebrate and build ourselves to enable us to be the best parents we can be. God sees your effort as parents and he will give you wisdom, grace, and strength to raise your children for his glory.
